Thursday, December 13, 2007

Office Holiday Parties

Now most people know that when discussing the my place of employment the conversation usually comes with its fair share of rants, raves, stories and bitching. 

Well last night was our office holiday party. It's the first year it has NOT been hosted at our CEO's house since I've been employed here. Yes there has been nostalgic talk of days when we were taking to a nice dinner and there were company wide gifts showered down on the employees or bonuses, but none of that since i've been here. Well the first year there were some small move, gas and iTunes gift cards spread around. Typically it's been a set of the most recent Grand National Championships and the years Holiday Ornament, which, incidentally arrive after the holidays usually. Now I can be a really big band geek but I do not want Marching Band DVD's for a gift and I will not hang ornaments on my tree that are from my place of employment. 

Back to locations of our parties...

The last two holiday parties have been somewhat awkward and the location has been far away which is unfortunate for three reasons. 1) it takes forever to get there and back  and 2) it's far enough away that unless you are going to commit to staying for more than a few hours you have to limit yourself on how much you can drink because of reason number 1. which brings us to problem number 3. In order to make the environment tolerable you feel the need to consume a number of beverages but you can't because of reasons 1 and 2. 

Needless to say I and many others were relieved to find that this years party would not be at the previous location. In fact this location offered a lot of freedom because it was only blocks from our office, there would be no hour commute one way, which offered the ability to consume more beverages and in less time which ultimately means that all involved are happier. 

Problem one: Bad location - solved new improved location

Now about the gifts.
We have had now showering of gifts of any sort so far. No bonuses. (I almost laugh to myself every time I type that.) No gift cards. No promises of band DVD's or holiday ornaments left on my desk after the holidays. (I'm actually o.k. with this one). I'm not sure where this leaves us. I believe our gift is that we get a holiday party. It's a bit of a conundrum.

Problem two: Bad gifts - well sometimes nothing is better than a lump of coal.

This years party was under new management and offered some new experiences for us. 
The Bad Holiday Sweater Contest and the Bandee Awards. 

Now let's address the bad holiday sweater contest first. 
We have a rather unique office environment as it is. We all spend a great deal of time with each other and for the most part all have a pretty good time when it comes to laughing and being bitter and jaded about our jobs. With most things around here we take what liberties we can get our hands on to the nth degree. This is no exception as you will see in the photo below. 
While we know it's tacky we did get some good laughs out of it...

Bad Holiday Sweater Contests gets a thumbs up for bringing some laughter to the office. 

Now on to the Bandee Awards...
First of all this comes with the disclaimer that a good majority of our office are HUGE Office fans. We have various paraphernalia from the show around, calendars, Schrute Bucks, bobble-heads even one person who really could be our offices Dwight Schrute. The Bandee Awards are a spin off of the Dundee awards from The Office. 

Such awards Presented were:
The Mollie Ringwald "Pretty in Pink" awarded to Travis (EC) for his use of pink in his outfits. 
The Fluffiest Hair Award,  The Biggest Collection of Colts Flare Award, The Funky Wardrobe, The "No, my mom does not pack my lunch" Award, The Most Proactive Dish Washer awarded to our COO, The Golden Credential Award, The Back That Thang Up awarded to My Boss for her skill in backing in our truck, The Sarcastic T-Shirt Award to our IT Manager, The Most Likely to Use Speakerphone Award to Cam, The Hottest Baby Momma Award, The "My Other Client is the Met" Award, The Biggest Belch from a Tiny Person Award, The Most Likely to Loose His Box Award, The Most Creative Use of Puppets in Video Conferencing Award, The Best Radio Phrase of the Year, "Oh Crap" awarded to me, The Best Ethnic Impersonator Award, The Most Likely to Make Fun of Everyone Award, The Biggest Diet Coke To Go Cup Award, The Kickin' It In Since the 90's Award, The Employee of the Month ...ONE Month Award, The DCI Fountain of Knowledge Award,  The Most Color Coordinating Outfits Award, The Human Shield Award, The Most Original Composer of One Word Songs, "Blah, Blah, Blah" awarded to our CEO, The Abe Lincoln Canadian Diplomat Award, The Most Likely to Become a Beet Farmer Award, The MVP and Mother Theresa Patience Award, The Wildfire Expert and Honorary California Firefighter Award.

Let us not forget the annual white elephant gift exchange. This event has brought us such gifts as the sponge bob boxers, lots of booze, multiple starbucks gift cards, fake floral arrangements, car survival kits and other such quality and tack gifts. 

This years high lights include the Light up Angel complete with fiber-optic color changing wings, the Chia Pet, the Scantily Clad yet Autographed Colts Cheerleader Calendar, The Beef Stick Gourmet Box, and yet again more booze. 

All in all the new format of the office holiday party was a success. Special thanks to the SAC Committee (Social Activities Committee) for all of their hard work.

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